Tip #1: While waiting for your first time to ever fly, always look out the window at all the big planes with your big brothers and your cousin.
Tip #2: When posing for a picture before getting on the really big cruise ship, do not stop looking at the ship. Who wants to see your face for the photo anyway. Hey, look! A big boat!
Tip #3: While cruising, get all decked out for Elegant Nights. If you have brothers, match with them. It makes everyone who passes you ooo and ahh and you’ll hear a lot of people say, “Captain.”
Tip #4: When you go to the beach in Cozumel, Mexico, be wary of the sand and ocean at first …
… then throw caution to the wind and eat you some good sand!
Tip #5: Take every opportunity you can to get attention from cute chicks.
Tip #6: The wetted-down-look is not even good on babies.
Tip #7: Dinner in a fancy dining room is fun. Spoons make an excellent noise on crystal glasses!
Tip #8: Tanning is an important part of cruising. Don’t forget the crucial top of your feet …
Tip #9: Boat rides are very relaxing. No motion sickness here!
Tip #10: Always be aware of your surroundings. There just might be a cookie or brownie from a waiter named Neil on that table!
Tip #11: The best time to learn how to cruise along the furniture is, in fact, while on a cruise!
And finally, Tip #12: If you want special attention from the staff – lots of tickles and stares and admiring smiles and the one guy who always called Rusty his “little buddy” – just be ding dang cute the whole time!
